My Dad

Before my Mom and Dad were married, my Dad had two children with his former girlfriend which we never got to know. My parents separated since i was between 3 to 5 years old. Im the middle child and have an older brother and a younger sister. My Dad moved out of the house and went abroad to work and soon found a partner to live with. As far as I remember, he first visited us 5 years after he left, then 3 years after his first visit and later he visited us every year. Since 2003, he visited us twice a year and last year, 2004, we met up 3 times within the year. I do see him as "my Dad", to respect and love but somehow I felt that a big part of our lives was missing. As if what to tell him, how to show him love or how he shows us his love. Its really never there sometimes. Its plain old "Im your Dad" and "Were your children".
Im now 26 and this is the story I want to share to you. Im not sure if it is an angel or God's hand or voice that came to me.
On May of 2004, I got an email from my Dad saying that he got diagnosed for early stages of pancreatic cancer. He had diabetes for 15 years and was on continues medication. I never thought that this kind of sickness would infect him at the early age of 58. He emailed me ( and only me among the three of us siblings) weekly for results and further diagnosis from his doctor. And I was panicing as to what to do. Ive tried researches and asked around from friends for family doctors or known experts and sent him advises and herbal medicine, alternatives of sort to help out. I was feeling drastic and lonely cause what can I really do?
Months passed and he came home by July of 2004, he was quite fine but you can see how much he's already sufferred. He stayed for a week or two, cant hardly remember. And we had a really good time.
When he got back to his place, he started emailing me again of the condition he was in. Doctors said he was getting worse and gave him a few months to live. This made me feel so bad that I would cry alone and not tell anyone why. I would stare all day and just wait for the next day not noticing a week has already passed.
He came home September and he had to be brought to the Hospital because his condition was worse. I really didnt know what to do but we seeked for help and brought him to the best Hospital. 3 days after he just dissappeared and gone off back to his place. He was angry because we couldnt show more empathy and couldnt give him time. I felt really bad.
He even requested us to contact a number where we could find our two brothers and inform them of the situation. I found that hard to do since from what I know, they hated us.
One night before graveyard shift started, I was standing in front of our building having a cigarette at around 9pm. I noticed a couple waiting for their ride a few meters from where I was standing. The Lady looked really drunk or sick of some sort. She was acting weird and was also smoking a cigarette. Once she was done with her cigarette, she came near to where I was standing just beside the trash bin. She smiled at me and asked if I was working there. I said yes. She asked me personal stuff like my nationality, commented that I had a good smile and commented that were nice people. As we spoke I saw her husband or boyfriend just a glimpse above her shoulder smiling back at us and I smiled back at him. He then called her because their ride had arrived. "Linda, lets go". Just before turning her back on me she said "take care of your family" and smiled. I said thank you I will, and smiled back and they were gone. I did have an eerie feeling afterwards and kept thinking what she meant.
Three weeks later as I was preparing for another graveyard shift, i got a text message from an unknown number. In summary, the sender was asking me how my Dad was, what his condition is or if we got any news about him. I had this really strange feeling that something was wrong. I then asked who this person I was speaking to was. Surprisingly he said, its me, Jasper, your brother. Iwas so delighted and had mixed emotions and didnt know how to react but asked how he was and told him about us. He then informed me that he recieved a message that his Dad just passed away. And he even made sure if I knew my Dad was still ok or not just to be sure if we had the same Dad. And yes, it was confirmed, our Dad just passed away. Tears began to roll down my eyes and told him Ill get back to him cause I had to inform my family. I knew then that I had to be strong. Why me? Why choose me to bring the message? It was hard and I myself was having a hard time relaying what had happened.
After a while we got to the phone again to speak, me and Jasper. He was happy to have a good conversation and I too was glad.
We never got to see my Dad, he was crimated abroad and we found out a few months later that he was already brought home to their hometown to be buried beside his parents. It was really hard to deal with such incidents like ours. My Dad died angry with us which I knew of, we never got the chance to talk and express our feelings although it has always been there. I wished that one day he would forgive us for any misunderstanding that we had with each other.
Until one night, I awoke to a very cold touch on my arm and on my cheek. Ive never felt such coldness before. It was like an icy lip kissed me gently and caressed me while sleeping.  When I i opened my eyes I saw nothing and instead I smiled. I knew it was him, my Dad missing us and telling me he forgave us for all misunderstanding we had. I felt him say "I Love You". After that I fell asleep smiling.
I know it was a long story. I just wanted to share what I experienced. Im not sure if God sent me a message through his angels or if it was a miracle behind sorrow.
Thank You and God Bless.

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