My Gift From Above
By: bkanab30@yahoo.com

There was a point in time in my life where I didn't think anybody cared for me and I sheltered myself in my home.  I didn't want to be around people because I didn't want to be hurt anymore.  You see, I am a victim of emotional abuse by my husband.  It got so bad that I began to use drugs to deal with the internal pain.  I just couldn't deal with the verbal abuse anymore so I would take as many pills as I could just so I wouldn't have to deal with it.  It even got so bad that I didn't feel it was even worth living anymore and on April 1, 1999, I attempted suicide.  At the time, I was upset that I didn't succeed however I put myself in individual counseling.  During the next several months, the counseling was making it worse because I had to deal with the pain so what did I do, took more pills.  Finally one Sunday during church, during the prayer and praise time, I shut my eyes and prayed to Jesus to take a hold of me and help me with this pain.  During my prayer, I felt this incredible feeling come over, so powerful that its hard to describe.  It was as if someone had taken a hold of me or was holding me that all I could do was start crying.  My husband, who was sitting next to me, asked me why I was crying and all I could say was, "I'm going to ok."  He had no idea what I meant but I did.  I knew it wasn't going to be over night and I tried to be patient with Jesus.  In the next coming month when things weren't getting better and losing my faith, I questioned Jesus on why he was letting this to continue.  Finally on October 4, 1999, I had a complete nervous breakdown.  Its a night I will never forget.  My husband was at it again and once again I began to cry.  I could hear him in the background and as I was crying and shaking pretty bad, I prayed silently.  As I continued to pray, I could hear my husband calling my mother and before I knew it, my mother was at the house.  I told my mother to take me away from this house.  When we got into her car, I remember her asking what I wanted to do and I know that
it was the good Lord speaking through me and I said, "Take me to the hospital."  I put myself in the hospital and that is when I learned that I have an addiction to drugs.  The next day, my husband and I met with a therapist.  It was one of the hardest things I had to do but I told my husband that as much as I love him is how much I am scared of him.  Well, it has been nearly seven months now and I am so GRATEFUL that the Lord gave me my life back and my husband.  My husband and I both know that it was Jesus Himself that worked through us and helped us work together.  The abuse has stopped, I attend NA meetings weekly, and we make it a point to read the bible together and pray together every night.  As I look back on the past year, I know that when I questioned the Lord on why he wasn't with me, well I know now that He was with me at all times because He was carrying me and that I was NEVER alone!  Thank you Lord for giving me the
Gift of Life!

by Bonnie from WV

Please visit my pages and share the Good Word of the Lord.
Thank you,
Bonnie

My Secret Stairway

And God Said No


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