Angel in the Crowd
By: lance-rosie@verizon.net
My story begins back in 1997.  At this time,  I had already been in a ten year relationship with a gentleman that I loved dearly.  My father died when I was seven years old, so the only father figure I had ever really known was that of this gentleman.   He was five years older than I was.  I honestly thought the world of him.  He treated me real well.  He paid off my student loans and bought me a car and we even traveled around the world.  He let me know from the get go that children were definitely out of the picture.  He had no interest in having children.  I just accepted that because I was so in love with him.   My family and friends thought it was weird that he never proposed marriage.  I myself, did not think much of it since I was only 22 yrs old at the time.  Anyway, after 10 years in this relationship he finally proposed, we flew to Hawaii with his parents and tied the knot.  Well eight months into the marriage, he decided to drop the bomb on me and tell me about his involvement in another longterm relationship with another woman.  As you can imagine, I was completely devastated.   I lived at the gym and took very good care of myself.  I was 32 years old by this time.  Anyway, I was physically and emotionally the best Id ever felt.  Id been working for the same company for 9 years when he dumped me.  In the same week that he dropped the bomb on me, my employer told me that the company was reengineering and they were phasing my position out.  Although they paid me the same amount of money, they used me to fill in whenever somebody was out.  So I really didn’t have a position, per say.   This all happened in the same week;  husband dumps me and my position is phased out.  Honestly, I felt like my world had ended.  I remember driving home in the rain that day and thinking, why me?  Lord, what have I done to deserve this?   For the next several months, I would go to work come home and get into bed and cry myself to sleep every night.  I was in mourning.  Had lost so much weight.  Looked terrible!   During this time, I had a guy friend who invited me to church with him.  I really didn’t want to go, but I did.  I continued to go.  Through this time, I grew closer to the Lord.  I had my own apartment, so this was not only the worst and loneliest time in my life, but it was the best time of my life.  This forced me to lean on the Lord and discover who God really was.   Anyway, after a few years in mourning, I went on a few dates and this was not working for me.  I was emotionally not up to this.  So I stayed in my apartment crying and crying for the longest time.  I became so frustrated and disappointed in God.  I began to pray and plead that He heal my marriage and just place me back in the arms of my husband.  Well, this wasn’t happening.  So I  just began to pray that God  not bring a man into my life period.  I grew angry and very depressed.  I expressed to God that I was not interested in men!  And that I never wanted to get married again!    One day I woke up feeling so depressed and suicidal.  I decided that morning that the pain was too intense and that I could no longer deal with it anymore!   I wanted to just die.  Seriously!  I was thinking of ways to kill myself.  That morning, I did end up working a full day.  The whole day I kept thinking what would be the least painful way to take my life?  By the end of the work day, I decided to go to the local community college to take a couple classes to take my mind off of things.  When I got there, wouldn’t you know, the two classes I was interested in taking were full.   Just my luck!  As I began to walk back to my car, I held my head down sobbing.  The sun was setting and all I could see with my head down, was people walking to and from their classes.  All of a sudden, it was as if the red sea had parted, a beautiful young African-American woman excused herself through the crowd and on over to me.  She grabbed hold of my arm and said these words………………..I have been sent here as a messenger from God.  Then she said my name………Rosemary, you are not going to go home and kill yourself.  God has a plan for your life.  He loves you and cares for you.  I was so freaked out because she knew my name.  I had never met this person in my life.  How could she know my name?  So I asked her?  How did you know my name.  She replied ………I don’t know your name, but “HE” does and “HE” loves you very much.   She began to talk to me and tell me about a bad relationship she recently experienced  with a boyfriend and I felt as though I were listening to my own story or experience.  How could she know what I have gone through?  This was absolutely amazing to me!  From that day on, things began to change.  Not overnight, but they did eventually.  One day after work, a group of coworkers wanted to go to a nearby pub for happy hour.  I really did not want to go, but I did.  The whole place was packed.  Not a single empty seat, well, except the one next to me.  How could this be?  This placed was so packed, it was standing room only.  The only empty seat happened to be the one next to me?  This was not by chance or coincidence, but by God’s devine appointment.  A handsome young man who worked for the same company that I did walked over and asked if he could have the empty seat next to me.  Well, it wasn’t mine to claim, so I said whatever.

That’s where he sat!  He was so funny!  For the first time after my divorce, I was able to really laugh.  This guy made me laugh.  Not only was he tall, blond, blue eyed and great looking, but he was funny too!   Well, after that night,  I hadn’t put too much thought into that evening.   One day at work my phone rings and I pick up and its him.  He tracked me down.  We both worked for the same company but it was a very large company and I didn’t even know he worked for this company.   He wanted to get to know me.  I of course, was not at all interested but I agreed to let him take me out to dinner.  We drove to the beach for dinner and walked along the pier.  I asked him to tell me about himself.  Wouldn’t you know, his wife left him for another man and he had a six year old daughter.  He was divorced like myself.  The greatest thing about him, was that he was not just any man, he was a “Godly” man.  I thought, it doesn’t get any better than this.   Well, it did!  Long story short,  Just over a year later, we had a big beautiful wedding and was later blessed with two children (boy and girl).   My husband bought me a house and til this day, we only know one kinda life to live and that’s a life serving the Lord. You see, only God knows the plan He has for your life, a plan not to harm you but a plan to give you hope and a future….  Jeremiah 29:11.   As much as we would like to believe that the choices we make for ourselves in our lives are the right ones, only God knows what is best for us.   

     
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